ZThemes

Ally Cookies

banshee-bitch:

Ingredients

  • 2 cups tightly packed entitlement
  • 1 1/4 cup conceited pride (baseless variety works best)
  • 3/4 cup inconsistency 
  • 1/2 cup ‘It’s ok when I say/do it because I mean it affectionately’ (may adjust to a lack of taste)
  • A dash of superiority complex
  • One bag (Choke On A Dick) Charcoal Chips

Directions

  • Combine Entitlement and Pride until haughty in consistency. 
  • Fold in Inconsistency (Or don’t, you know)
  • Gradually add It’s Ok When I Do It until mixture is comfortable enough to ignore future call-outs.
  • Sprinkle in superiority complex (the flavor will be noticeable)
  • Stir in Choke On A Dick Charcoal Chips, and pray that they do their job.
  • Bake in a pre-heated hellhole for thirty minutes, or just until cookies catch fire
  • Set cookies in a damp place for several weeks. Let mold form.
  • Serve to your ~ally~ of choice

Happy Ally Week!